Today’s temper tantrum is sponsored by the Inadequate Halloween Costume. Apparently this is a thing. Apparently kids decide THE DAY before Halloween (or two days, or the day of, or whatever) that their Halloween costume is not worthy of wear.
Since we are such clairvoyant parents, we thought it would be best to wait until the last minute to purchase a Halloween costume for our dear boy. We kind of saw this coming with Harrison, as his antics have long predicted that he might be capable of such unhappy despair. He has been talking about being a dinosaur for months. We looked at costumes online for hours, but none seemed to match his refined tastes. There was brief mention of a skeleton, and I think Justin tried to talk him into being Donald Trump one night. We had a backup pirate costume in case something came up, but Harrison made it clear that he did not want to be a pirate. Well, since we were out of town earlier in the week, the kids’ preschool teacher sent me a message last night telling me the kids would be wearing costumes today for a parade. No problem, though, right, because I’m Super Prepared Mom, and we had those good old pirate costumes on deck waiting for a purpose. I retrieved aforementioned costumes from the depths of the basement last night and set them out nicely, so our morning would go smoothly, and we could just bound off to preschool when everyone was up and ready.
Harrison, that kid, you know, he’s always one step ahead of me. Although I had a perfectly wonderful getup for him, he was in a fit because he didn’t have a dinosaur costume. I explained tirelessly that it was not Halloween, that this was just a fun thing to do at school, and that we were still going to get a dinosaur costume. This wasn’t good enough. In fact, he decided that he’d be upset that he had to wear clothes at all to school. And, that, my friends, is why I showed up to preschool with a child who was half dressed. (On a side note, I also threatened to cancel Halloween, but I was talked out of it by a good friend who reminded me that you simply do not cancel Halloween this early in the game. Save that shit for when he’s seven.)
But it gets better. I DID take my boy to get his costume. We went to the special Halloween store and everything. We perused the aisles until I found the ONLY dinosaur costume in his size. And guess what? It was beautiful. It was a T-rex costume that would scare the socks off of any other preschooler on the block.